My Story, Jul '15
Pallav Bonerjee continues his series of
personal narratives on psychology, people and destiny, this time on the need to
do away with biases around gender and sexuality
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Artwork credit: Himanshu Patra |
From our very early childhood years, we are
taught by our parents, elders and teachers to evaluate almost everything from
the ‘good-bad’ and ‘right-wrong’ perspective. It is an essential component of
the socialisation process, where we learn to stay away from the ‘bad/wrong’ and
work towards all that is considered ‘good/right’ for us. Through consistent use
of rewards and punishments, we are primed to identify objects, activities,
places, events, situations and people through that very same lens, judging them
quickly and modifying our actions accordingly. We hardly ever try to find the
basis of these evaluations, mainly because we may be too young to ask at the
time they are being formed. Gradually, they become part of our value systems
and belief patterns, thereby shaping our attitudes. It is a very efficient
process; one that helps us with decision making on a day-to-day basis
effortlessly. So that, effortful thinking is preserved mainly for the more
important and bigger decisions that would affect our lives.